Kebabs à la Janos, with Space Marinade

2 lbs meat (preferably chunks of dark meat procured from rivers—or just chicken or beef)
1/2 c red wine
1/4 c canola oil
2 Tbsp Montreal steak seasoning (or a combination of minced garlic, black pepper, coarse kosher salt, ground coriander, dill seed, and crushed red pepper)
1 Tbsp soy sauce

Cut meat into 1- to 2-inch cubes.  In a glass or ceramic dish (or a plastic bag), combine remaining ingredients.  Add meat and toss to coat.  Marinate in refrigerator for at least 30 minutes (preferably for several hours), turning meat occasionally.  Discard remaining marinade.

Prepare a medium-hot charcoal fire, gas grill, or magical smokeless space grill.  Thread meat onto skewers (preferably metal) and place on grill, turning occasionally while you bask in suburban lakeside nostalgia, keeping a wary eye on the moon, until desired doneness is achieved.

If you wish, prepare a second batch of marinade to drizzle on the meat while cooking, but be warned that with typical Earth-origin grills, this will cause significant flare-ups and is generally unnecessary.  If you have access to a smokeless space grill, this may be less of an issue.

–S.J. Hanover III